Unassisted Unmediated Home Water Birth With Legaci as Virtual Doula!!
Tova, Tova, Tova…. Such a superstar she is! I remember the first time I met with her on our call. I saw it in her eyes, a lioness. Far more capable than she ever knew.
Her partner attended the first call wearing a baby carrier with a teddy bear in it! I thought, wow this father is dedicated! I had a feeling he would be a super supportive partner! Together they were a match made in heaven.
On Thursday May 19th, I messaged Tova to schedule her birth prep call! She let me know she may be experiencing some braxton hicks contractions. Being this was her first pregnancy, she was unsure if they were real contractions or gas. Afterwards, she sent me a picture of her “bloody show” starting. I was so happy for her! “your cervix is thinning and beginning to dilate” I said. She responded with so much enthusiasm “awesome!”
Resting during early labor is one of my keys for a successful unassisted birth, so I was very admit on ensuring she was resting, drinking, and eating!
“Go about the day as normal. With a balance of resting. Try to get a 1-2 hour nap in if you can.” I said.
She continued to rest, fuel her body and send me pictures of her bloody show! All of her pictures looked perfect and normal!
That same day we gathered virtually with her partner Antonio! We practiced counter pressure, birth positions, breathing, techniques, and affirmations. During that call she had a few mild like contractions. She swayed in peace and serenity as she experienced the beautiful gift of life. Her partner Antonio did counter pressure as if he done it before in a past life!
After our call she met with her midwife. The midwife confirmed her son was much lower than her previous appointment. Tova decided to decline cervical checks. Which created peace in her heart and helped her mindset to not know. She continued to have mild contractions spaced out through out the day.
Friday May 20th in the morning she woke up to longer and stronger contractions.
“It’s been a very long night. Woke up from very intense contraction at 1am. They are still irregular and haven’t got consistent to 4 minutes yet. They are closer together than they were yesterday. But they keep getting closer to 5 minutes and then going back to 20 minutes apart. They mostly happen when I stand up or I am moving.” She said
I confirmed she was bridging into active labor. “Sounds like you are moving into active labor, remember your contractions are helping you. Your contractions are you. Your body is bringing you closer to your baby. Can we do a quick call soon?” I asked.
During this call we went over my labor techniques for a painless birth. Tova is also a sex and intimacy coach with that background I saw how quickly she was able to grasp what she learned and apply it to her contractions. Her favorite affirmation was “this feels so good” It worked so well for her! So I created an affirmation audio just for her. So she knew what to do during her contractions.
I titled the affirmation audio, “For Tova”. At that time I was fully invested in Tova’s birth journey and committed to her birth desires.
“I managed to fall asleep for ten min twice, so not much but I’m trying to keep resting upright. I watched your birth vlogs and they really helped me. The contractions are feeling a lot more pleasurable now, it’s like magic to just say yes it feels good!” Tova said.
The next day I sent her a photo that said “ you are made for this” She sent me back a photo of her mucus plug! “Congratulations,” I responded!
Later that night we moved around from the toilet, bathtub, and around her bathroom for hours. She rested and drifted off into sleep in between her contractions. I stayed with her on call that entire time.
Tova and Antonio originally planned to labor at home for as long as possible, and then head to the birth centre afterwards. They were hesitant about giving birth at that birth centre. It just so happened as they were preparing to go, someone else was birthing in the room they had selected. This was a very rare scenario and changed their plans drastically. They had a beautiful tub at home, that their hearts truly desired to give birth in. They asked me "if they decided to give birth at home, would I guide them through it?" I responded confidently, "of course!" They felt safe and happy with their arrangements. To confirm if this decision was best for them I asked "does the thought of giving birth at home make you smile inside?" Tova said "It does for me!" and Antonio said it was their original plan prior to their plans of a birth centre birth.
As we got closer to transitional labor I felt the fatigue and questions of time in Antonio and Tova. So I decided to have a chat with just Antonio. I spoke with him alone to ensure Tova could stay in her birth zone.
During the chat I shared with him how confident I am in their capabilities of having an unassisted birth. I said, “there is going to reach a moment when Tova is going to look at you in your eyes and she’s gonna feel like she can’t do it anymore. She is going to give you signs that she wants to give up and when she starts doing that, It means your baby is coming in the next few minutes and all we need to do is just encourage her to keep going” he was positive and understood the assignment!
We were both on board and we continued back to support Tova. Antonio was saying affirmations to her like “You can do this” “Breathe, and let go” “You are doing so good”
After some time, Antonio felt it was important to give Tova some space. Having studied and taken care of animals his whole life, he learned that most mammals feel safer when they are alone and in a dark environment while in labor. So he went to the other room across from the tub where he could grant her space and rest up for what was to come.
I believe It was true, In that space while he was napping Tova achieved so much! During that time her and I laboured on the toilet and in the hands and knees position. In that moment her babies head began to EMERGE!
I said “reach down Tova, do you feel the head?” At first she was unable to. I taught her my technique of how to feel for her babies head. After a few contractions she was able to feel her babies head.
I let her know you can tell Antonio to come now. So she said “Antonio!”
Antonio woke up out of his sleep he went straight into birth mode! I said “the head is here”
He helped Tova into the beautiful bath tub and she began to bring her baby down.
While she was breathing and grunting baby down she looked over at Antonio and she said to him “I don’t know Antonio, I don’t know about this anymore.”
AND THAT was the moment, I was telling him about. Instead of giving up! WE all remained positive WE ALL kept going!
He kept reassuring her. “you can do this! We are almost there” he said. “You can do this Tova, you are made for this! This is your moment” I said
But It wasn’t until she fully believed in herself, that this happened….
“I can do this! I can do this!” Tova said.
During that contraction she birthed her babies head. On the next contraction her babies body was born. Tova and Antonio reached down and their DNA was born in the hands of their OWN!
I will never forget Tova’s face, her mouth dropped as she saw her son for the first time and she looked at Antonio almost in disbelief like oh my gosh I did it! Her baby cried right away, he had powerful lungs. He had perfect color in the skin tone, and his body parts were moving. He was a big boy, with a full head of hair!
As I guided them on what to do next with their newborn like how to rub the newborns back, cover him with towels, and clean out any mucus. A tear dropped down my face. I realized how powerful my purpose was and I was so grateful to witness two become THREE!
I helped her birth her placenta and coached them on how to safely get back into their bed.
May 21st 2022 Tova gave birth to a healthy baby boy! After the birth she went to her birth centre. With her baby still attached to the placenta! He weighed 8lbs and 6oz! His head was 36.5 cm!
They also checked Tova and said “what birth!?” She had no tears and required no stitches.
She did a phenomenal and seamless job. They did everything perfectly. I still can’t believe how alert and present she was. She was talking to me in between every single contraction!
She was in labor for 2 days and she never gave up! I was up for 24 hours straight, and my faith in them did not waiver. I loved how Antonio stayed positive throughout the entire labor even when he felt it was getting lengthy. He did everything he was suppose to do and I commend him for that.
It was a seamless performance. For a FIRST time mom, I am still in awe of her accomplishments! Her not tearing was the cherry on top! But her son Ari was the entire sundae! He is so perfect and handsome! Such a champion he is! Welcome to the world Ari! I am beyond grateful to be apart of your journey!
Written By: Legaci 'The Natural Birth Queen'